Next Christmas… - Reflections Counselling Lincoln - Counselling and Psychotherapy in Lincoln

Next Christmas…

As we put away the Christmas decorations for another year and put the unwanted gifts on eBay, it’s a great opportunity to think about how your Christmas was and think about how you would like next Christmas to be.

Maybe it was everything you hoped it would be, or a time of tension, loneliness and boredom. Maybe it was frankly a disappointment which has just left you feeling exhausted and worried if your credit card will get you through January?

Here is something very simple you can do to make your next Christmas the Christmas you’d really like to have.

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Get your journal or pen and paper and finish off that last mince pie as you sit and reflect on the Christmas you just had.

How was it?  And I mean, honestly.

Firstly, what were the good points?  People arriving?  People leaving?  Did you enjoy seeing friends you haven’t seen all year?

What were the bad points?  Enforced time with family?  Enforced time alone?  The drain on finances?   Family members being critical?

Now, think about what you could do to make it the Christmas YOU would really like.  Maybe you would like to be laid on a beach, or alone with your partner, or alone completely on a day of self indulgence.  Maybe you were alone this Christmas and don’t want to be next year.

Whatever it is, there is some good news; you have until next Christmas to make it happen.

  • You want to spend it alone? Tell people now, and give them the chance to get used to it.
  • You want to keep a firmer hold on purse strings? Talk with people now, and agree on limits.
  • You want to be with family, but periods alone would be helpful? Tell them now that you need time alone and it’s nothing personal, and give them the chance to get used to it.
  • You want more help? Start thinking of things to delegate and tell people why; let them understand how much difference it will make for you.
  • You need a break from the kids? Make arrangements for them to be taken out, or to stay with friends/family.  Talk with people now and give them the chance to get on board with the idea.
  • You don’t want to be on your own? You have a whole year to work on this.  Depending on the reasons why you just spent Christmas on your own, you can look at making changes in your life.

Christmas is a time of traditions and expectations, so the key to making changes is give people plenty of notice and time to adjust their own expectations.

So with a little reflection now, you can start laying the foundations for Christmas next year to be the one you want.

 

About the Author Jane

Jane Travis is a qualified and experienced counsellor and clinical supervisor in the Lincoln area. She has been working at Reflections Counselling Lincoln since 2005. She is also The Happiness Enabler, and runs Lincoln Counsellors Network.

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