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Christmas survival guide day 2- new Christmas Traditions - Jane Travis, Reflections Counselling Lincoln (1)

Christmas Survival Guide Day 2: New Christmas Traditions

What Christmas traditions do you have? 

We all have some sort of Christmas Traditions, from the traditions most people have like a tree and Santa, to the traditions different countries have, like food and songs.

Then there are those silly family Christmas traditions - the time and method of opening gifts, what's eaten for lunch, games, knowing that great aunt Flossie will drink too much sherry, fall asleep and snore - it's all good. 

But things change, children grow, relationships break up and people move away. 

How can you handle change at Christmas?

Christmas survival guide day 1- Guilt free ways to spend less this Christmas - Jane Travis, Reflections Counselling Lincoln

Christmas Survival Guide Day 1: Guilt Free Ways To Spend Less This Christmas

Do you need to spend less this Christmas?

No matter what your income, Christmas can (and often does) strain the budget and despite knowing Christmas is on 25th December EVERY December, it can still creep up and take us unawares. 

January is a bleak enough month already without receiving a credit card bill that got out of hand, so how can you enjoy Christmas without breaking the bank?

Here's how to spend less this Christmas without feeling like scrooge!

How to manage emotions when the unthinkable happens- Reflections Counselling Lincoln - Jane Travis

How To Manage Your Emotions When The Unthinkable Happens

*Article originally posted on

'Have you seen the news today, mum?' said my son.

My heart sank - what now? What new horror has happened in the world?

Today, I watch the news in disbelief, my head swimming as I hear about a truck being deliberately driven into innocent people in Nice, just the latest of a series of horrendous acts of terror, civil unrest and war.

How can I possibly cope with more horror?

The Downside Of Gratitude - Reflections Counselling Lincoln - Jane Travis

The downside of gratitude

Gratitude journals are very popular at the moment, with just cause - many of us are more blessed that our grandparents could have ever imagined.

But it's easy to get wrapped up in insignificant trivia that frankly doesn't matter, so it's good to be reminded of lifes simple pleasures and of what's really important.

However there's a dark side to gratitude that is often missed, and can cause you damage.

Let me explain...

How to be fabulous! Don#t let your negative body image spoil your night, noone notices your flaws but you - Reflections Counselling Lincoln

How To Be Fabulous!

*Article originally posted on

This was a Girls Night Out that had been months in the planning.

Spirits, along with heels, hems and hair, were high. The collective volume - also high.

​Let's take a look at two of the girls in the group:

On the night out there are a pair of identical twins: for this experiment I'll call them 'Twin A' and 'Twin B'.They're totally identical - hair, height, weight but also have a similar character.

Twin A is having the time of her life. She is chatting, laughing, dancing, smiling and flirting.

Twin B looks very uncomfortable. She stays in her seat, avoids eye contact and self consciously pulls at her clothes.

What's making their behaviour so different?

Setting boundaries - Reflections Counselling Lincoln - Jane Travis

Setting Boundaries

I was watching something on TV, and they said:

'The truth is like a toothbrush - you only share it with people you trust'.

And I thought 'Eew! I'd NEVER share a toothbrush!'

But some people do, and they don't mind doing it!

Which is fine, we're all different​, and we all have different boundaries.

The trick is KNOWING those boundaries and enforcing them, so when someone visits me and has forgotten their toothbrush, they will get a firm 'EEW NO!' when they ask to borrow mine!​

Knowing how I feel about sharing my toothbrush is clear, but how do I work out other boundaries in life?​

12 things I've learned in 12 years as a counsellor - Reflections Counselling Lincoln

12 Things I’ve Learned In 12 Years As A Counsellor

Did you ever wonder what a counsellor learns from their clients?

Well I'll tell you!

I started my counselling practice Reflections Counselling Lincoln in January of 2005, so have run my own counselling business for over 12 years now.

It's been an amazing 12 years and I have worked with some truly amazing and inspirational people. ​

Client confidentiality dictates that I can't tell you about individual stories, of course, but I have worked with people from all backgrounds, with all types of issues and the transformations have been truly memorable.

I feel humbled by the courage that has been shown and I feel honoured that I have been trusted with their story.

So let's take a look at what I've learned as a counsellor

Do you want more time- Reflections Counselling Lincoln - Jane Travis

Do you want more time? Try this!

Time.  It's such an interesting concept.  

Probably the most valuable commodity we have, but we waste so much of it.   

But what if I was to tell you a really simple way to find yourself more time?

When antidepressants aren't enough - Reflections Counselling Lincoln - Jane Travis

When Antidepressants Aren’t Enough.

People have opinions about antidepressants:

Some people see taking them as a sign of weakness, proof that they have failed in some way.

Some people have very high expectations of them, and expect to feel happy whilst on them.

​Some people are afraid of them, worrying that they will become addicted and never be free of them. 

Whatever your view, they are very helpful for a lot of people.  

But what happens when you come off them?


Next Christmas…

As we put away the Christmas decorations for another year and put the unwanted gifts on eBay, it’s a great opportunity to think about how your Christmas was and think about how you would like next Christmas to be.

Maybe it was everything you hoped it would be, or a time of tension, loneliness and boredom. Maybe it was frankly a disappointment which has just left you feeling exhausted and worried if your credit card will get you through January?

Here is something very simple you can do to make your next Christmas the Christmas you’d really like to have.